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| 2017 United Airlines NYC Half - 1:28:15 |
For me, running is therapeutic. And my way to fight depression. After embracing running in my 30s from absolutely no running in my
20s, I have a little perspective now that I can share. I have a good grasp of
how vastly different life has been during both times. I ran in my teens and grew to hate
it. That hatred carried into my 20s, until I decided to try it again for the
challenge of running a marathon. I love the challenge, I hate the stress. I can
say that about a lot of things in my life. As I enter into another decade, I’m
grateful for how far I’ve come and look forward to the challenges ahead.
Running as therapy:
Living in New York City is stressful. It’s expensive. People
are in your face almost constantly. No matter how nice people appear to be
after 9/11, there are still plenty of rude ones. And the weather is so unpredictable,
it can disrupt whatever plans you may have.
I work construction. Construction is stressful. Clients
demanding your services and for its completion yesterday, even though they
requested today. Government regulators making sure you are performing your
duties with priority to the public. And for the amount of stress that comes
with the job, the money isn’t enough to get ahead in this expensive city.
So I run. Not away from but towards the stress. Convert the
stressful, anxiety filled energy into a healthy, therapeutic energy. An energy
that brings benefit to the body for fighting disease, anxiety, and ironically…
stress. Using the running’s stress to fight negative, depressing, unproductive
stress. It is sort of an oxymoron but its true. By setting goals for myself,
like shooting for faster race times, and taking on new challenges, like
training for an Olympic triathlon, you add stress to beat stress.
Embracing another decade:
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| Swimming as cross training - Chelsea Piers |
With the tools to defeat stress that took me a while to
learn, I embrace another decade in life. Feeling younger and healthy despite
being grayer and slower. Yes slower! My body aches more now after every run or
workout than just 5 years ago. Recovery has become a way of life that go
hand-in-hand with my running. I took up triathlons for cross training. It works
better for me than weight training. Those who knew me in my 20s remembered me
for being all about weight training. That has changed. I’ve evolved. Plus I had
a hernia, so I had to seriously cut back. And that freed up time for more
running.
As I was saying, entering a new decade has me equipped with
many lessons learned. I am able to perform better athletically despite getting older and slower physically, which requires me to apply these lessons on a daily
basis. The Results: I ran my 3rd fastest half marathon at the 2017
United Airlines NYC Half . More swimming for cross training, less running to
allow recovery time, and my consistent but not as frequent as when I am
marathon training, massage regimen.
So I remain optimistic that I can perform to even faster
times, without stressing the times. Whenever someone asks, “What time are you
shooting for?” for any particular race. I always reply,
“I’m just going to go out there and have fun and do the best
I can.”
And that is really how I see it. Speaking out loud an actual
goal time adds stress. Like when I was shooting for the Boston Marathon. Every
marathon I would shoot for a BQ time and then some, and every one I would be
disappointed. Scrambling to figure out where I went wrong as the post marathon
blues would settle in. Although the challenge was fun, the stress sucked. I am
so glad that is over with. April 2018, I’ll finally get to run Boston. In the
back of my mind I would like to do it again, sure. Just like when people ask me
about goal times for any other race, sure I have a number in the back of my
head. But I don’t need that kind of stress. It’s enough that my job and
regulators hold me accountable for things I do at my job, no need to add stress
by being accountable for race time goals I profess to the world. No thank you,
I got into running to defeat anxiety and unhealthy stress, not add to it.
Clip from my run portion of my first indoor tri in Garden City, NY - January 6, 2017
As a side note, the 2017 United Airlines NYC half felt like any other race. I did surprise myself by running a sub 1:30. My training focus has been for my next marathon and improving my swim. The usual culprits came back: left hamstring weak and on the verge of re-injury, as well as my chronic right hip problems I've been having during training. I was forced to take it extra slow along the West Side of Central Park. And by mile 11, I just didn't have the legs to run a negative split. I did finish strong in the last mile as I approached the tunnel. Check my Strava stats for this race below:
https://www.strava.com/activities/906363218
Conclusion: the War Against Depression
I spent years diving deep into numbers behind a computer
screen. Sitting behind a desk visualizing and coming up with plans that would
eventually become reality for the public to use. It is depressing when these
plans don’t work out as visualized. People can get hurt as watchdogs oversee your activities, ready to punish you. Clients prioritize their pockets over the public that
leaves you in a peculiar situation to keep paying the bills in an ever increasing costly city. All this allows for depression to settle in very
quickly.
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| Trying Normatec boots for the first time - March 2017 |
Especially after a marathon, when 3 or 4 months of training
has completed. What now! Did I get the time goal I wanted? How long can I keep
doing this? Oh you ran two marathons within a month of each other? Did you take
the time to digest what happened in the first one? Were you adequately prepared
for the second one? Are you in over your head? How many friends did I cancel on
to accommodate my training? Who’s birthday did I miss?
There are so many questions that add that unhealthy stress
and depression. But the beauty about this running lifestyle is: I shut my mind
off, put on my running shoes, and run. The important questions get answered
during your run. The rest can wait. And my life gets better. Because the run helps me not stress the small stuff. The big stuff gets dealt with through epiphany. Its like the miles help the blood circulate better to your brain, for better thinking, and less distractions on the open roads. And that will continue
as run my first marathon outside of the United States: The 2017 Virgin Money
London Marathon, April 23! Couldn’t ask for a better way to make my Masters
debut.
